New Year's Wishes

A friend of mine recently wrote on his FaceBook page: "According to the Jewish calendar, the year is 5769. According to the Chinese calendar, the year is 4706. This means that the Jews went without Chinese food for 1,063 years. This period was known as the Dark Ages."

Funny, eh?

Yes, funny, and it reminded me that the Jewish New Year begins tonight. While those who know me know that I'm hardly the religious type, I was brought up Jewish, and the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashonah, always meant to me a new beginning. In fact, I always regarded the Jewish New Year as MY new year what with summer ending; school beginning; and the cycle of life seeming to renew itself at about the same time of year. So indeed, happy New Year to all my friends, whatever your religion, or even if you don't have a religion!

I don't mind seeing the end of the year that just passed; it was a difficult year for me, what with my dear Laura passing away at the end of July. I'd like to forget much of 5769, and who could blame me?

So, I'll look ahead to 5770. It's human nature - or should be - to look ahead, and since I'm human (I know it's disappointing to those who think I'm much more than human!), here are some of the things I'm hoping for in the New Year:

• A break! Can I get a break in the New Year? If it weren't for BAD luck recently, I wouldn't have had any luck!
• A MegaMillions jackpot. Twice a week, I buy two "MegaMillions - Big Game" tickets, knowing that some day I'll be standing at a podium and microphone next to a 15-foot-by-30-foot check made out in my name. And, I'll be lamenting the fact that I shouldn't have "wasted" that second dollar on this particular drawing!
• A phone call from Hollywood super-agent Ari Emanuel -- the kid brother of President Obama's Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel. Ari would be calling me to ask if he could represent me in the sale to HBO of my television mini-series script "Nevada Easy." And, as a bonus, Ari's client Martin Scorsese wants to direct the movie. Oh, before I forget, happy New Year, Ari. You too, Martin!
• A female companion... not to replace Laura, because that's impossible, but just an intelligent, beautiful woman who wants to spoil me - okay, someone like Laura. Hopefully, she'll be wealthy - I married (twice) for love, and while that was great, I'm thinking of choosing the next time for both money AND love. Maybe that'll be the "break" I was talking about, up above!
• A World Series title for the Red Sox, an NBA Championship for the Celts, a Stanley Cup for the Bruins, and a Super Bowl win for the Pats. And, finally...
• Peace on earth. (Hey, why not? I can dream, can't I?)

A hippo gnu deer to all my animal friends, too!